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Who
is your mother?
There are dozens of
books on the shelves that seek to define, smooth
and enhance the relationship we have with our
mother. Many cite
it as the most important and yet most mysterious
bond we will ever experience.
There is no one else on the planet who carried
you inside her. For those who never knew their
biological mothers, the bond with the woman
who nurtured them is equally perplexing and
rewarding.
But
how well do you know this woman?
Have you ever interviewed her to discover what
makes her tick? She may be as ever-present as
the furniture or your siblings, but she's an
individual in her own right and you might be
amazed what you'll discover if you explore her
further.
Getting
Started
Genealogists know that
there are gems to be unearthed in talking to
family members about their memories and the
things only they know about family connections.
You can check on
Genealogy.com for advice, or on Amazon.com and
other book sites to find books that will give
you great questions to ask your mom
-- and who knows, you may find yourself hooked
and start interviewing other family members,
too.
Springboard
Questions
Try some of these questions
on your mother, and let the conversation lead
you down paths of discovery. Each
one will expose a facet of her personality and
background that may be news to you.
- What is your
very first
memory?
- Who was your
first "best
friend" -- any why?
- Did you have
any nicknames
when you were growing up? How did they
come about?
- What was the
hardest thing for you
to go through as you were growing up?
- Tell me your
happiest memory.
- What was your
first thought
when you saw me?
- Why did you
name me
what you did?
- What have I
done that surprised
you most?
- What did you
want to be
when you grew up?
- Do you have
a dream
I can help you fulfill?
Timing
is Everything
Questions like these
are like a luscious dessert -- they take time
to prepare, and need to be savored. They're
not the kind of things you just blurt out over
the cell phone while shopping at Wal-Mart. Make
a special time to spend with Mom and enjoy the
stories she tells. This is the
best gift you could ever give her, on Mothers
Day or any day.
You
may want to tape record the conversation
for your siblings or even your own children
to enjoy some day. Don't tape without your mother
knowing it, of course. Just set up the recorder
in an unobtrusive place in the room, settle
back with some coffee or iced tea, and forget
the machine is there.
If you think you know
your mother inside and out, be prepared to be
surprised! Make
a project of getting to know her this year.
It is a gift you'll both enjoy.
Happy
Mothers Day! |
